Shalia's Diary #9 Read online

  “I guess I have a lot to live up to then,” Meyso chuckled. “Let me know when you’re ready for more.”

  He was still dressed, the mean old thing. I do enjoy looking over that granite block body. At least his trousers were tented, giving me a nice reminder of what he had in store for me. I gulped the last of my water and stroked his crotch. “Ready, big man.”

  His look went from sweet Imdiko doctor to a menace worthy of any Nobek. His eyes glittered with dark promise. “Good. All fours, precious pet.”

  Sir, yes sir. I got in position in a hurry.

  He shoved at the log I’d been manacled to, rolling it up so that it was right behind my feet. “Spread wide. I’m putting the cuffs back on you,” he said.

  I had no problem with that. Restraints and I are good friends. I even got a sense of comfort to feel the manacles close over my ankles once more. Somehow being secured makes me feel secure. Isn’t that weird?

  Meyso fussed with a strap lying near the comforter thing I crouched on. I noticed a few other items too, and my mouth went dry. He must have collected them when he got the water for me.

  He chuckled at the look on my face as he rolled up the end of the comforter closest to my head, forming a kind of pillow. “Put your head down. I want your arms together and between your legs.”

  I did as I was told, my pulse starting to race again. My cheek settled in the billowy thickness of the fabric. That part was comfortable, though from what I’d seen, comfort was going to be in short supply soon.

  Meyso looped my wrists together, drawing my arms straight between my legs. “Too tight? Circulation all right?” he asked, wiggling a finger between my skin and the soft tether.

  “I’m okay,” I said in a weak voice. For the moment until he really got going. Though even the thought of that made my pussy warm. My wide open, exposed pussy. Good night, he had me on full, wanton display.

  I was balanced on knees, shoulders, and head, and hogtied. The Imdiko confirmed that. “I’ve secured the other end of the strap to the log behind you. Now you’re my toy, with that cute ass in the air where I can enjoy it.” He sounded pleased with himself. “Now this.”

  From his pile of goodies, he plucked a gag, one with a ball to bite into. I trembled but accepted it without him having to tell me to open my mouth. Things were going to get intense.

  “Yell twice if you need to stop for any reason,” he told me. I noticed Meyso’s breathing had quickened. He was as excited as I was, though probably not as nervous. I jerked a nod to show him I understood.

  “Good girl.” He stroked my hair, back, and ass. Down to my pussy, to spread the wetness he found there all over my trembling womanhood. Sliding it over my clit. Oh, sweet prophets. I was so powerless in this position, and I’d seen the other stuff he was planning to use on me.

  Meyso tilted his head down so we could look into each other’s eyes. His knowing smile filled me with equal parts thrill and dread. “So frightened and yet so eager. I can see it on your face, how much you want what I’m going to give you while apprehensive at the same time. It makes me feel drunk for you to give me such power. I will not fail you, lovely Shalia.”

  He straightened and took something else from the pile. A long strip of midnight blue fabric. He carefully cradled my head to slip the material beneath, and tied it over my eyes, cutting off my sight. He was already in complete control of me, yet I felt more vulnerable than ever. And he still wasn’t done with asserting absolute rule.

  “I am putting ear plugs in next,” his cultured voice said. “Remember what to do if it becomes too much. Two loud shouts, and it stops.”

  With that, something soft was inserted into one ear and then the other. I plunged into silent darkness, cut off from everything but Meyso’s touch and my own heartbeat.

  The feeling of his hands stroking over my cheek and back became the center of my world. There was nothing else. As the seconds – minutes? – passed, I clung to that one bit that kept me anchored.

  And then he was gone. His hands lifted from me, leaving me alone in the soundless void, where I couldn’t move, couldn’t hear, couldn’t see. I lay there, all alone.

  Seconds felt like hours. As time crept past ever so slowly, my nerves began to strain. Where was Meyso? Had he and the other two left the room, left me tied and cuffed helpless to a log?

  I thought about giving those two screams that were supposed to free me from the emptiness. As time stopped and refused to move, to bring me to the moment when Meyso would touch me again, the need to escape grew stronger. It pressed inexorably against my psyche until only two things kept me from calling out: the need to not disappoint Meyso and the fear that my cries would go unanswered. I wasn’t sure which terror was the worst.

  When a warm hand caressed my ass cheek, I jerked with a muffled yelp. Not only did it startle me, but after all that time of nothing, the gentle stroke was as powerful as a lightning strike. Then relief flooded through me. Meyso was still there. I hadn’t failed him.

  My rear was gripped by two hands, smooth but strong hands that massaged the globes hard. I was reminded of my open stance, that my ass and pussy were exposed and defenseless. The mixture of fear and anticipation returned.

  Fingers rubbed up and down my slit, smearing the telltale wetness that spoke of how much the kinky side of me enjoyed my situation. When one plunged deep into my cunt, I yelped again, biting into the gag between my teeth. The finger used me fast and hard, and my feet did their best to kick the comforter. The cuffs held them still however, underscoring yet again how helpless I was.

  Then Meyso’s touch was gone again. When moments passed without it returning, tears stung my eyes. I did not want to be left alone like before.

  Fortunately – well, depending on one’s view of what was yet to come – the abandonment didn’t last more than perhaps ten seconds this time. Once more, my buttocks were stroked, and I relaxed into the joy of contact.

  It took only an instant to realize it wasn’t a hand touching me. This object was stiff, though there was some sense of give. I remembered the flat black handle poking out among the pile of things Meyso had gathered to use on me, the wider, thick rectangle of leather with holes it attached to. The Imdiko had his paddle out, ready to use on me.

  I tensed. A hand rubbed my shoulder, offering some measure of comfort even as he reminded me of what was to come by continuing to stroke my ass with the paddle. I made myself soften, knowing that stiffened muscles would make the spanking hurt worse. He patted my shoulder, rewarding me for being good.

  With a final squeeze, the touch was gone. So was the paddle. I forced myself to breathe deep and steady, the one thing I could control in my situation. I concentrated on remaining lax.

  With my senses cut off, I had no warning before the first swat splashed across my rear. A bright wash of pain pinpointed all my attention on my suddenly stinging ass. Heat flushed across the cheeks and pulsed deep into my flesh.

  I whimpered against my gag and tried to return my attention to breathing. Another snap of contact against my butt thwarted the attempt. Oh my gosh, with all my senses cut off, all I could think about was the whack of the paddle on my poor vulnerable backside.

  Then a soft, questing touch moved against my pussy, stealing some of my focus from the throb of my ass. Something – not a finger or cock – moved through my folds. It was slippery, lubed and ready. I guessed a dildo.

  I guessed right. It settled itself against my entrance. With easy pressure, it slid inside, tucking itself within me. In and out, it slipped, fucking me gently. I trembled in my bonds, in my dark and silent world.

  It pushed deep inside, and something harder settled against my clit. I had no chance to try to figure out what was going on when the vibrations started, quivering my channel and clit at the same time. I sank into pleasure as the dildo shuddered in and against me.

  I’d all but forgotten the warm ache of my spanked butt when the paddle renewed the hurt. This time it worked the mounds of flesh until it fe
lt like they glowed all over. Meyso didn’t miss an inch of my ass, spanking me thoroughly while the vibrator pulsated.

  I could only lie there and take it, a maelstrom of sensation churning so that I couldn’t separate bliss from torment. Cut off from all but feeling, each stroke of the paddle was profound, as was every tremble from the dildo. Arousal built slowly but surely, fed by hurt, excitement, and the void of most of my senses.

  The steady, exacting tattoo of the paddle stopped. The vibrator eased away from my clit, sliding out of me. Then it pushed back in, and the contact with my eager flesh was renewed for a moment, feeling more intense for having been temporarily absent. Then it was gone again as Meyso fucked me with the toy.

  A few more strokes, and he left it inside me again to continue the spanking. By then, I was much closer to climax, my every atom grasping to bring me closer. Once more, the paddle missed no part of my raised ass, making me hotter, making me moan, making me want more.

  Instead, the paddling ended. The dildo slipped out. I was alone in the dark with nothing now. My body throbbed with hunger, but there was nothing to relieve it. I wriggled as much as my bonds would allow, which wasn’t much. A desperate whine escaped me, loud in my head in all that silence.

  I felt the hot, slick prod of Meyso’s larger cock nudge my ass. I jerked, trying to impale myself on it, but again, there was almost no give. I couldn’t make him take me.

  Fortunately, he had mercy on me. His cock speared me, taking my clinging sleeve in one thrust. At the same time, his smaller member skewered my pussy. A heady jolt of exultation spiked in my belly.

  His lengths ran in and back, their thick friction sending a delicious shuddering through me. My sheaths clamped down on him, tightening me so that I could feel each amazing inch of him as he had me. His groin pounded against my ass, bring fresh intensity as he made contact with the tender spanked flesh.

  His pace was steady, but not enough to make the burn burst into full blaze. I was stoked hot, but I needed more. I fought my restraints, trying to free myself so I could move against him, so I could have that elusive release that darted just beyond my reach. Instead, I got a meaty palm against my sore backside. It was a warning, one that hurt enough to make me comply.

  I crouched there, my defenseless ass in the air, unable to assert myself. Made to stay still while Meyso enjoyed my ass and pussy with those long, ceaseless strokes that kept me right on the point of combustion. I quivered uncontrollably, wanting more and unable to have it. There was nothing but the unremitting fucking, the tantalizing tease of almost-orgasm, and the knowledge that I was powerless to get what felt so much more like need than want.

  He was relentless in forcing me to wait for his pleasure. Much like how he’d left me in senseless limbo in the dark for so long, now I had to endure forever at the cusp of climax. It was the sweetest agony I could imagine. I was in hellish paradise, exquisitely tuned to every stroke, every errant brush of air, every nuance of change.

  When he finally stroked my clit, the out-of-nowhere contact sent me straight to orgasm. One moment I lay suffering an eternity of arousal. The next, a light grazing touch blasted through my senses. The darkness encasing me heaved as my body was torn apart by rapture. The air quaked with violence as my body convulsed over and over.

  As the massive shocks began to ease, I felt the cock in my ass surge and the body behind me stiffen. With sight and sound cut off, I felt attuned to Meyso on a telepathic level. I imagined feeling the pull of climax from deep within, of passion unfurling and yanking itself free of his body. Of shattering exaltation as it jetted from him in brutal bursts.

  Imagining his climax brought me another of my own. I swam in the depths of release until the last spasm left me.

  It was Aslada and Jaon who untied me, who took the blindfold, earplugs, and gag away so that I rejoined the real world. Meyso lay wasted to one side, his body shivering in the aftermath. He’d tormented himself to the breaking point in tormenting me. He required as much aftercare as I did from the other two, who seemed delighted to have both of us to dote on.

  “If my Imdiko didn’t earn us that second chance to court you, then you are beyond our reach,” Aslada joked as he held a protein pouch for me to slurp.

  “If I wasn’t to give you three another chance after what you all did, then I’m a hopeless idiot,” I mumbled. “And you should toss me in the lake for it. Don’t be surprised if I follow you around like a puppy from now on.”

  For a bunch of guys who didn’t have to make their case in the first place, Clan Aslada knows how to convince beyond a shadow of a doubt. Earn a second chance, indeed. I dare anyone to keep me from coming back for another round.

  November 23

  I’m in shock. Total, utter shock.

  I walked into Mom’s room to find her sitting up in a chair. She’s been working hard in rehab and seeing her out of bed was amazing. She smiled awkwardly as I applauded her.

  “Look at you! How does it feel to be up and about?” I asked.

  “Pretty good,” Mom said in the quiet voice she’s been using the last few days. Her emotional storms had been absent for several visits now. I didn’t know whether to worry or feel relieved. Dr. Kini hadn’t given me much to go on except to say, “She’s making some important decisions. Give her time to work things out for herself.”

  I was about to cheer for her a little more when Meyso came in, his expression worried and stunned as he gripped a handheld, one of the larger ones the doctors use to make notes on their patients and access their files. Before he could say anything, Mom held up her hand in warning. “I haven’t said anything to her yet, Mikey. Please give us a few minutes.”

  Meyso looked at me, the concern growing in his eyes. He took a deep breath and nodded to Mom. “All right. Shalia, I’ll be outside the door if you need me afterward.”

  With that, he turned and left me alone with Mom. Dreading whatever she was about to tell me, I managed to joke in a weak voice. “And here I was thinking the last few days have gone so well.”

  She gave me a crooked smile. “Well, it wouldn’t be me if I couldn’t throw a kink in things, now would it? Maybe you should sit down.”

  I reluctantly trudged to the chair she’d motioned to, one next to hers. I sat. She held out a hand and I took it. Her touch was warm, and I wondered how bad this would be if she was being so nice.

  She squeezed my hand. “I’ve decided on where I’m going for the remainder of my physical rehabilitation.”

  I looked at her in confusion. “I thought there was only one for you to go to, that nice spa-type one five minutes away.”

  She shook her head. “I’m leaving Kalquor, Shalia. I’m going to a medical center in the Galactic Council’s space. It’s not as fancy as the one Mikey was sending me to, but I’ve been assured they are well-regarded.”

  I blinked. Mom was going away? Leaving Kalquor? Leaving me? “Wait. What?”

  “Dr. Ken made the arrangements. We discussed it last night, and he agreed it seemed like a good idea. The Galactic Council gave their approval for the transfer. I leave in four days.”

  Kini had allowed it? Did he have that kind of authority? I couldn’t remember, not when I was floored by Mom’s sudden announcement. “But – but why? I said I wouldn’t keep you from seeing Anrel. I thought you wanted to be around her. She’s going to miss her mimi.”

  And I was going to miss my mother, as much as she drove me nuts. Even though I’d been ready to shut her out for Anrel’s sake not so long ago. But that had ceased to be a concern. Mom was great with Anrel. She couldn’t go. Except…

  “It’s me. You don’t want to be around me,” I said. “Because I plan to join a clan. Because I made you have the procedures.”

  Mom snorted. “For heaven’s sake, Shalia, I don’t blame you for anything. You did what you thought was best. What I would have done for you, had our roles been reversed. Believe me, there’s nothing I’d rather do than get to know my daughter in a way I wasn’t able to before.”<
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  “Then you shouldn’t go. If you really don’t hate me for having Meyso operate, then you would stay.” I felt the crush of guilt, making it hard to draw a breath.

  She squeezed my hand again. “Of course I don’t hate you. I love you more than anyone else. I always have.”

  “Stay. We need you. I need you. You want to know me without the bipolar disorder in the way. I want to know you too.”

  Mom barked a harsh laugh. “How can you figure me out when I don’t have a clue about the person I’ve become? And how can I learn about you when I’m busy working on me?” She scowled, but it wasn’t with the old temper. It was the kind of expression you make when you’ve got a big job staring you in the face and no patience for anything else life wanted to throw your way. “I need time away from all this other stuff. If I’m going to do something with the life I have left, I have to concentrate on me. I can’t do that if I’m trying to navigate old hurts and patterns with you.” She gave me a look that as wretched as it was determined. “You have enough on your plate. You don’t need me added to the mix.”